Helping Others

Once there was a small boy named Shankar. He belonged to a poor family.  One day, he was crossing through the forest carrying some woods. He saw an old man who was very hungry.  Shankar wanted to give him some food, but he did not have food for his own.  So he continued on his way.  On his way, he saw a deer who was very thirsty.  He wanted to give him some water, but he did not have water for himself.  So he went on his way ahead.

Then he saw a man who wanted to make a camp but he did not have woods.  Shankar asked his problem and gave some woods to him.  In return, he gave him some food and water.  Now he went back to the old man and gave him some food and gave some water to the deer. The old man and the deer were very happy.   Shankar then happily went on his way.

However, one day Shankar fell down the hill.  He was in pain but he couldn’t move and no one was there to help him.  But, the old man who he had helped before saw him, he quickly came and pulled him up the hill.  He had many wounds on his legs.  The deer whom shankar had given water saw his wounds and quickly went to the forest and brought some herbs.  After some time his wounds were covered.   All were very happy that they were able to help each other.

Moral: If you help others, then they will also help you.

Fear vs Respect

A Long time ago a very cruel king named Virat Singh was ruling the city of Vijay Nagar. All citizens were fearful because of his cruelty.

Virat has a dog named Jack, which he used to love more than anything, one fateful morning Jack died. Virat Singh organized last rituals for the dog, entire city came to a cremation ground. Virat Singh was very happy to see that people love him so much and he felt he is the most popular king in the world. After few days Virat Singh died, but no one came for his funerals.

Moral: Respect is something you have to earn, you cannot force it on others to respect you. There is a thin line between Fear and Respect, every one of us should understand it and do necessary corrections in our personalities.

The Needs and Desires

Once upon a time, there lived a King who, despite his luxurious lifestyle, was neither happy nor content.  One day, the King came upon a servant who was singing happily while he worked. This fascinated the King, why was he, the Supreme Ruler of the Land, unhappy and gloomy, while a lowly servant had so much joy.  The King asked the servant, “Why are you so happy?”

The man replied, “Your Majesty, I am nothing but a servant, but my family and I don’t need too much, just a roof over our heads and warm food to fill our tummies.”  The king was not satisfied with that reply.  Later in the day, he sought the advice of his most trusted advisor.  After hearing the King’s woes and the servant’s story, the advisor said, “Your Majesty, I believe that the servant has not been made part of The 99 Club.”

“The 99 Club? And what exactly is that?” the King inquired.  The advisor replied, “Your Majesty, to truly know what The 99 Club is, place 99 Gold coins in a bag and leave it at this servant’s doorstep.”  So the King ordered to do it.  When the servant saw the bag, he took it into his house.  When he opened the bag, he let out a great shout of joy, So many gold coins!  He began to count them.  After several counts, he was at last convinced that there were 99 coins.  He wondered, “What could’ve happened to that last gold coin? Surely, no one would leave 99 coins!”

He looked everywhere he could, but that final coin was elusive.  Finally, exhausted, he decided that he was going to have to work harder than ever to earn that gold coin and complete his collection.  From that day, the servant’s life was changed. He was overworked, horribly grumpy, and castigated his family for not helping him make that 100th gold coin.  He stopped singing while he worked.  Witnessing this drastic transformation, the King was puzzled.  When he sought his advisor’s help, the advisor said, “Your Majesty, the servant has now officially joined The 99 Club.”

He continued, “The 99 Club is a name given to those people who have enough to be happy but are never content, because they’re always yearning and striving for that extra 1 telling to themselves, “Let me get that one final thing and then I will be happy for life.”

Moral:  We can be happy, even with very little in our lives, but the minute we’re given something bigger and better, we want even more! We lose our sleep, our happiness, we hurt the people around us, all these as a price for our growing needs and desires.  We must learn to maintain a balance of our need and desires to enjoy a happy life with what we already have.

The Cracked Pot

A water bearer in India had two large pots, each hung on each end of a pole which he carried across his neck. One of the pots had a crack in it, and while the other pot was perfect and always delivered a full portion of water at the end of the long walk from the stream to the master’s house, the cracked pot arrived only half full.

For a full two years, this went on daily, with the bearer delivering only one and a half pots full of water in his master’s house. Of course, the perfect pot was proud of its accomplishments, perfect to the end for which it was made. But the poor cracked pot was ashamed of its own imperfection and miserable that it was able to accomplish only half of what it had been made to do.

After two years of what it perceived to be a bitter failure, it spoke to the water bearer one day by the stream. “I am ashamed of myself, and I want to apologize to you”.  The bearer asked, “Why? What are you ashamed of?”  The Pot replied, “For these past two years I am able to deliver only half of my load because this crack in my side causes water to leak out all the way back to your master’s house. Because of my flaws, you don’t get full value for your efforts”.

The water bearer felt sorry for the old cracked pot, and in his compassion, he said, “As we return to the master’s house, I want you to notice the beautiful flowers along the path.”  As they went up the hill, the old cracked pot took notice of the sun warming the beautiful wild flowers on the side of the path, and this cheered it somewhat.  But at the end of the trail, it still felt bad because it had leaked out half its load, and so again it apologized to the bearer for its failure.

The bearer said to the pot, “Did you notice that there were flowers only on your side of your path, but not on the other pot’s side? That’s because I have always known about your flaw, and I took advantage of it. I planted flower seeds on your side of the path, and every day while we walk back from the stream, you’ve watered them. For two years I have been able to pick these beautiful flowers to decorate my master’s table. Without you being just the way you are, he would not have this beauty to grace his house.”

Moral: Each of us has our own unique flaws.  We’re all cracked pots.  In this world, nothing goes to waste.  You may think like the cracked pot that you are inefficient or useless in certain areas of your life, but somehow these flaws can turn out to be a blessing in disguise.”

Thirsty Crow

One hot day, a thirsty crow flew all over the fields looking for water. For a long time, he could not find any. He felt very weak, almost lost all hope. Suddenly, he saw a water jug below the tree. He flew straight down to see if there was any water inside. Yes, he could see some water inside the jug!

The crow tried to push his head into the jug. Sadly, he found that the neck of the jug was too narrow. Then he tried to push the jug to tilt for the water to flow out, but the jug was too heavy.

The crow thought hard for a while. Then, looking around it, he saw some pebbles. He suddenly had a good idea. He started picking up the pebbles one by one, dropping each into the jug. As more and more pebbles filled the jug, the water level kept rising. Soon it was high enough for the crew to drink. His plan had worked!

Moral: Think and work hard, you may find solution to any problem.

Lazy Donkey

Bhola owns a donkey called Khandya. Bhola is a very tolerant and kind master. The donkey is lazy and is always finding ways to avoid work.

Once while returning with loads of salt on his back, Khandya falls in the river. He realizes that the fall has lessened the weights of the sacks as the salt has dissolved in the water.

The next few days Khandya purposely falls into the water every day. Bhola is unhappy at the way Khandya is behaving because he is losing money in the process. He decides to teach Khandya a lesson.

The next day instead of salt bags he loads Khandya with bags of cotton. Khandya is unaware of the change. As planned, he falls into the water and gets the bags wet. He is surprised to find the load unbearable. His otherwise master also starts beating him.

Khandya learns his lesson and starts behaving.

Moral: Work with honesty and sincerity because laziness will ruin you.

Looking at Mirror

One day all the employees reached the office and they saw a big advice on the door on which it was written: “Yesterday the person who has been hindering your growth in this company passed away. We invite you to join the funeral in the room that has been prepared in the gym”.  In the beginning, they all got sad for the death of one of their colleagues, but after a while, they started getting curious to know who was that man who hindered the growth of his colleagues and the company itself.

The excitement in the gym was such that security agents were ordered to control the crowd within the room. The more people reached the coffin, the more the excitement heated up. Everyone thought: “Who is this guy who was hindering my progress? Well, at least he died!”  One by one the thrilled employees got closer to the coffin, and when they looked inside they suddenly became speechless.  They stood nearby the coffin, shocked and in silence, as if someone had touched the deepest part of their soul. There was a mirror inside the coffin: everyone who looked inside it could see himself.

There was also a sign next to the mirror that said: “There is only one person who is capable of setting limits to your growth: it is YOU.” You are the only person who can revolutionize your life. You are the only person who can influence your happiness, your realization, and your success. You are the only person who can help yourself.  Your life does not change when your boss changes, when your friends change, when your partner changes when your company changes. Your life changes when YOU change, when you go beyond your limiting beliefs when you realize that you are the only one responsible for your life. “The most important relationship you can have is the one you have with yourself”.

Moral: The world is like a mirror: it gives back to anyone the reflection of the thoughts in which one has strongly believed. The world and your reality are like mirrors lying in a coffin, which show to any individual the death of his divine capability to imagine and create his happiness and his success. It’s the way you face Life that makes the difference.

Never to Give-Up

One day a farmer’s donkey fell down into a well. The animal cried piteously for hours as the farmer tried to figure out what to do. Finally, he decided the animal was old and the well needed to be covered up anyway it just wasn’t worth it to retrieve the donkey. He invited all his neighbors to come over and help him. They all grabbed a shovel and begin to shovel dirt into the well. At first, the donkey realized what was happening and cried horribly. Then, to everyone’s amazement, he quieted down.

A few shovel loads later, the farmer finally looked down the well and was astonished at what he saw. With every shovel of dirt that fell on his back, the donkey was doing something amazing. He would shake it off and take a step up. As the farmer’s neighbors continued to shovel dirt on top of the animal, he would shake it off and take a step up.

Pretty soon, everyone was amazed as the donkey stepped up over the edge of the well and trotted off!

Moral: Life is going to shovel dirt on you, all kinds of dirt. The trick is to not to get bogged down by it. We can get out of the deepest wells by not stopping. And by never giving up! Shake it off and take a step up!

Two Frogs

A group of frogs was traveling through the woods and two of them fell into a deep pit. When the other frogs saw how deep the pit was, they told the two frogs that they were as good as dead. The two frogs ignored the comments and tried to jump up out of the pit with all their might. The other frogs kept telling them to stop, that they were as good as dead. Finally, one of the frogs took heed to what the other frogs were saying and gave up. He fell down and died.

The other frog continued to jump as hard as he could. Once again, the crowd of frogs yelled at him to stop the pain and just die. He jumped even harder and finally made it out. When he got out, the other frogs said, “Did you not hear us?” The frog explained to them that he was deaf. He thought they were encouraging him the entire time.

Moral: There is power of life and death in the tongue. An encouraging word to someone who is down can lift them up and help them make it through the day. So be careful of what you say. Speak life to those who cross your path. The power of words… it is sometimes hard to understand that an encouraging word can go such a long way.

The Dreaming Priest

Long time ago there lived a priest who was extremely lazy and poor at the same time. He did not want to do any hard work but used to dream of being rich one day. He got his food by begging for alms. One morning he got a pot of milk as part of the alms. He was extremely delighted and went home with the pot of milk. He boiled the milk, drank some of it and put the remaining milk in a pot. He added slight curds in the pot for converting the milk to curd. He then lay down to sleep.

Soon he started imagining about the pot of curd while he lay asleep. He dreamed that if he could become rich somehow all his miseries would be gone. His thoughts turned to the pot of milk he had set to form curd. He dreamed on; “By morning the pot of milk would set, it would be converted to curd. I would churn the curd and make butter from it. I would heat the butter and make ghee out of it. I will then go to that market and sell that ghee, and make some money. With that money i will buy a hen. The hen will lay may eggs which will hatch and there will be many chicken. These chicken will in turn lay hundreds of eggs and I will soon have a poultry farm of my own.” He kept on imagining.

“I will sell all the hens of my poultry and buy some cows, and open a milk dairy. All the town people will buy milk from me. I will be very rich and soon I shall buy jewels. The king will buy all the jewels from me. I will be so rich that I will be able to marry an exceptionally beautiful girl from a rich family. Soon I will have a handsome son. If he does any mischief I will be very angry and to teach him a lesson, I will hit him with a big stick.”During this dream, he involuntarily picked up the stick next to his bed and thinking that he was beating his son, raised the stick and hit the pot. The pot of milk broke and he awoke from his day dream.

Moral: There is no substitute for hard work. Dreams cannot be fulfilled without hard work.

Boy's Job Appraisal

A little boy went into a drug store, reached for a soda carton and pulled it over to the telephone. He climbed onto the carton so that he could reach the buttons on the phone and proceeded to punch in seven digits (phone numbers).  The store-owner observed and listened to the conversation.

Boy: ‘Lady, Can you give me the job of cutting your lawn?

Woman: (at the other end of the phone line): ‘I already have someone to cut my lawn.’

Boy: ‘Lady, I will cut your lawn for half the price of the person who cuts your lawn now.’

Woman: I’m very satisfied with the person who is presently cutting my lawn.

Boy: (with more perseverance): ‘Lady, I’ll even sweep your curb and your sidewalk, so on Sunday you will have the prettiest lawn in all of Palm beach, Florida.’

Woman: No, thank you.

With a smile on his face, the little boy replaced the receiver.  The store-owner, who was listening to all this, walked over to the boy.

Store Owner: ‘Son… I like your attitude; I like that positive spirit and would like to offer you a job.’

Boy: ‘No thanks.’

Store Owner: But you were really pleading for one.

Boy: No Sir, I was just checking my performance at the Job I already have. I am the one who is working for that lady I was talking to!’

Moral: This is what we call ‘Self Appraisal’.  Every time if we don’t get ahead of others, we blame others for it.  We should look to our self and compare, find own weaknesses and work hard to throw away weaknesses.  Always Work Hard, Honest and with full Dedication.  It will always pay up.

The Travelers and the Plane Tree

Two men were walking along one summer day. Soon it became too hot to go any further and, seeing a large plane tree nearby, they threw themselves on the ground to rest in its shade.

Gazing up into the branches one man said to the other, “What a useless tree this is. It does not have fruit or nuts that we can eat and we cannot even use its wood for anything.”

“Don’t be so ungrateful,” rustled the tree in reply. “I am being extremely useful to you at this very moment, shielding you from the hot sun. And you call me a good-for-nothing!”

Moral: All of God’s creations have a good purpose. We should never belittle God’s blessings.

A blank question paper

One day a professor entered the classroom and asked his students to prepare for a surprise test.  They waited anxiously at their desks for the test to begin.  The professor handed out the question paper with the text facing down as usual.  Once he handed them all out, he asked his students to turn the page and begin.  To everyone’s surprise, there were no questions, just a black dot in the center of the page.

The professor seeing the expression on everyone’s face, told them the following, “I want you to write what you see there.”  The confused students got started on the inexplicable task.  At the end of the class, the professor took all the answer papers and started reading each one of them aloud in front of all the students.  All of them with no exceptions described the black dot, trying to explain its position in the middle of the sheet etc.

After all had been read, the classroom was silent.  The professor began to explain, “I am not going to grade on you this, I just wanted to give you something to think about.  No one wrote about the white part of the paper.  Everyone focused on the black dot and the same happens in our lives.  We have a white paper to observe and enjoy, but we always focus on the dark spots.  Our life is a gift given to us by God with love and care.  We always have reasons to celebrate, nature renewing itself every day, our friends around us, the job that provides our livelihood, the miracles we see every day.”

“However, we insist on focusing only on the dark spots, the health issues that bother us, the lack of money, the complicated relationship with a family member, the disappointment with a friends etc.  The dark spots are very small compared to everything we have in our lives, but they are the ones that pollute our minds.  Take your eyes away from the black spots in your life.  Enjoy each one of your blessings, each moment that life gives you.  Be happy and live a life positively!”

Moral: As the professor explained, life is a bag of good and bad things, we all have positives and negatives along the way.  But we must always concentrate greater on the positives for a healthy and happy life.  Life goes on no matter what so do not waste your time thinking about the negatives.

The way God help

There was a small village by the river. Everyone lived happily and offered regular prayers at the village temple (Church). Once during the monsoon season, it rained heavily. The river started overflowing and flood entered the village. Everyone started to evacuate their homes and set out to go to the safe place.

One man ran to the temple (Church). He quickly went to the priest’s room and told him, “The flood water has entered into our homes and it is rising quickly. And water has also started to enter the temple. We must leave the village as in no time it will sink under the water! Everyone has set out to go to the safer place and you must come along”. The priest told the man, “I am not an atheist like you all and I have a full faith in God. I trust the God that he will come to save me. I will not leave the temple, You may go!” So, the man left.

Soon, the water level started to rise and reached the waist height. The priest climbed on the desk. After a few minutes, a man with the boat came to rescue the priest. He told the priest, “I was told by the villagers that you are still inside the temple, so I have come to rescue you, please climb on the boat”. But the priest again refused to leave giving him the same reason. So the boatman left.

The water kept rising and reached to the ceiling, so the priest climbed to the top of the temple. He kept praying to the God to save him. Soon the helicopter came, they dropped the rope ladder for the priest and asked him to climb on and get inside the helicopter so they can take him to the safer place. But the priest refused to leave by giving him the same reason again! So the helicopter left to search and help others.

At last, when the temple nearly submerged under the water, the priest kept his head up and started complaining, “Oh Lord, I worshiped you for all my life and kept my faith in you! Why didn’t you come to save me?!” The God appeared in front of him and with a smile, he said, “Oh mad man, I came to save you three times! I came running to you to ask you to leave for the safest place with other villages, I came with a Boat, I came with a Helicopter! What is my fault if you didn’t recognize me?!”

The priest realized his mistake and asked for forgiveness. He got his chance to go to the safe place one more time, which he accepted.

Moral: In life, opportunities come unknowingly without any recolonization. We fail to recognize it and keep complaining that life didn’t give us the opportunity to lead a successful life. Always take every chance you get to make a better life.

Evening dinner with father

A son took his old father to a restaurant for an evening dinner.  Father being very old and weak, while eating, dropped food on his shirt and trousers.  Other diners watched him in disgust while his son was calm.

After he finished eating, his son who was not at all embarrassed, quietly took him to the washroom, wiped the food particles, removed the stains, combed his hair and fitted his spectacles firmly.  When they came out, the entire restaurant was watching them in dead silence, not able to grasp how someone could embarrass themselves publicly like that.  The son settled the bill and started walking out with his father.

At that time, an old man amongst the diners called out to the son and asked him, “Don’t you think you have left something behind?”.

The son replied, “No sir, I haven’t”.

The old man retorted, “Yes, you have!  You left a lesson for every son and hope for every father”.

The restaurant went silent.

Moral: To care for those who once cared for us is one of the highest honors.   We all know, how our parents cared for us for every little thing.  Love them, respect them, and care for them.

Developing a relationship

Nita was recently married and had started living in a joint family with her husband and in-laws.  After a few days, she started to realize that she is not able to get along with her mother in law.  Nita’s mother in law was conservative whereas Nita was liberal with modern lifestyle.  Soon they both started quarreling due to differences in opinions and lifestyle.    As days and months passed, none of them changed their behavior.

Nita became very aggressive over the time and started to hate her mother in law.  She started to think about how to get rid of her mother in law.  Once, as usual, when she quarreled with her mother in law and her husband took his mother’s side, she became where angry and left to her father’s home.  Nita’s father was a chemist and she told him about everything that’s been happening.  Then she pleaded with her father that give her something poisonous, so she can mix it up and give it to her mother in law to get rid of her, else she won’t go back to her husband’s home.

Nita’s father felt pity at her situation but told her, “If you give poison to your mother in law, you and I both will end up in jail.  It is not the right thing to do”.  But, Nita was in no mood to listen and understand.  Finally, her father gave in.  He told her, “Ok, as you wish but I don’t want to see you in jail, so do as I tell you”.  Nita agreed.  Her father brought a powder and told her, “Everyday when you make a lunch or dinner, just mix a little pinch of this powder in your mother in law’s meal, since the quantity will be less, she won’t die quickly but will slowly in few months and people will think she has died naturally”.

He also told her, “Because no one should have doubt on you, from today onwards, you will not fight at all with your mother in law but instead you will be very caring towards her, even if she says something which you don’t like, you will not be rude, you will simply be polite only”.  Nita agreed thinking she will be free from her mother in law’s quarreling in few months and came back to her in-laws and as advised by her father, she started mixing the powder in her mother in law’s meals and behaved very caring and polite whenever her mother in law said something.

As time started to pass, Nita’s mother in law’s nature also started to change.  Because Nita was being very caring towards her, she too started to be affectionate towards her.  Five months passed and Nita had been mixing the powder but atmosphere of the house was changed.  There were no quarrels, both were praising each while talking to neighbors.  They got very attached to each other like a mother and daughter.  Now, Nita started to get worried thinking due to the powder, her mother in law may die soon.

She ran at her father’s home and told him, “Dad!  Please give me the antidote to cure the effect of that poisonous powder you gave!  I don’t want to lose my mother in law, she is just like my mom and I love her very much”.  Her father smiled and said, “Which poison?  I had simply given you a sweetener!”

Moral:  Each person is different which may be due to their own circumstances.  This can often lead to many differences.  However, we must try to understand each other and adjust a little to make a healthy relationship with each other.  And, when such differences arise between persons, it is the duty of their loved ones to keep them calm and guide towards the right path.

Your attitude determines how you live your life

Your attitude determines how you live your life.

Even if –at any given time–your choices of action are limited, your choices regarding your attitude are not. Always choose a positive attitude.

A positive attitude makes you happier and more resilient, it improves your relationships, and it even increases your chances of success in any endeavor. In addition, having a positive attitude makes you more creative and it can help you to make better decisions. To top it all off, there are studies that show that people with a positive attitude live longer than their sourpuss counterparts. Below you’ll discover 21 ways to create and maintain a positive attitude.

1. Have a Morning Routine. How you start your morning sets the tone for the rest of the day. Make sure that you have an attitude-boosting morning routine that puts you in a good mood so that you can start the day off right.

2. Carry An Attitude of Happiness With You. Instead of waiting for external things to make you happy, be happy and then watch how that influences the things that go on around you. That is, instead of telling yourself that first something good has to happen, and then you’ll be happy, be happy first. Happiness is an attitude, not a situation.

3. Relish Small Pleasures. Big pleasures—graduation, getting married, being promoted, having your book published—come too infrequently. Life is made up of tiny victories and simple pleasures. With the right mental attitude, watching the sunset, eating an ice cream cone, and walking barefoot on the grass are all you need to be filled with joy.

4. Smile. Smiling will give you an instantaneous attitude boost. Try smiling for a minute while you think of a happy memory or the last thing that made you smile. Smiling releases endorphins and serotonin, also known as the feel good hormones. It’s a lot easier to adopt a positive attitude when the chemicals being released by your body are conducive to well-being.

5. Upload Positivity to Your Brain. Read books with a positive message, listen to music with uplifting lyrics, and watch movies in which the protagonist’s optimism helps him/her to overcome obstacles and win, despite the odds. Change your attitude for the better by uploading as much positivity into your brain as you possibly can.

6. Take Responsibility. At any moment your attitude can be that of a victim or of a creator. The first step you need to take to shift from victim-mode to creator-mode is to take responsibility. Here’s the attitude of a creator:

I create my life.I am responsible for me.I’m in charge of my destiny.

7. Have a Zen Attitude. Think of life not as something that’s happening to you, but as something that’s happening for you. Look at any challenging situation, person, or event as a teacher that’s been brought into your life to teach you something.

The next time you find yourself thinking, “Why is this happening to me?” choose to have a Zen attitude, instead. Ask yourself, “What am I supposed to learn or gain from this”? or “How will this help me grow and become a better, more enlightened being?”

8. Be Proactive. A reactive person allows others and external events to determine how they will feel. A proactive person decides how they will feel regardless of what may be going on around them. Be proactive by choosing your attitude and maintaining it throughout the day, regardless of what the day may bring.

9. Change Your Thoughts. Positive thoughts lead to a positive attitude, while negative thoughts lead to a negative attitude. Changing your attitude is as easy as hitting the “pause” button on what you’re thinking and choosing to think different thoughts.

10. Have a Purpose. Having a purpose in life gives you a fixed point in the horizon to focus on, so that you can remain steady amid life’s vicissitudes and challenges. Bringing meaning and purpose into your life—knowing why you are here—will do wonders for your attitude.

11. Focus On the Good. In order to have a positive attitude, focus on the good. Focus on the good in yourself, the good in your life, and the good in others.

12. Stop Expecting Life to Be Easy. The truth is, life gets tough at times. For all of us. It can even be painful. But you’re brave and resourceful, and you can take it. Know that sometimes things won’t be easy, and adopt the attitude that you have what it takes to deal with anything that life throws at you.

13. Keep Up Your Enthusiasm. Enthusiastic people have a great attitude toward life. Have a list of ways to lift your enthusiasm ready for those times when you feel your zest for life draining away. Being enthusiastic will help you maintain the attitude that life is good and that you’re lucky to be alive.

14. Give Up On Having An Attitude of Entitlement. Think of the parable “Who Moved My Cheese?” by Spencer Johnson. Two little mice and two miniature people are put in a maze. Here’s what happens:

When the mice discover that the cheese isn’t where it’s supposed to be, they immediately get to work on finding another piece of cheese.The two miniature people, instead, get angry that the cheese has been moved. They waste time expressing outrage and blaming each other.

Stop demanding that things be handed to you. Your attitude at all times should be the following:

It’s up to me to get what I want.Good things come to those who work hard.I adapt to change easily and quickly.I keep going even when things get tough.

15. Visualize. When things aren’t going your way, keep a positive attitude by visualizing yourself succeeding and achieving your goals. When Nelson Mandela was incarcerated—in a tiny cell that was just 6 feet wide–he kept his hopes up by visualizing himself being set free.

Mandela once said, “I thought of the day when I would walk free. Over and over again, I fantasized about what I would like to do.” By visualizing his release he was able to maintain a positive attitude, even when he found himself under extraordinarily difficult circumstances.

16. Limit Your Complaints. Whining about anything and everything is not conducive to a positive attitude. When you complain you’re saying negative things about a person, place, or event, without offering a solution to fix the situation. Instead of complaining, do the following:

Remove yourself from the situation.Shift your perspective about the situation.Offer a possible solution.Accept that there’s nothing you can do to change the situation and that complaining about it just fosters negativity.

Constantly complaining leads to a bad attitude. So stop complaining. Instead, start looking for solutions or accept what cannot be changed.

17. Watch Your Words. Use positive words when you talk to yourself. Studies have found that positive self-talk can boost your willpower and help you psych yourself up when you need to get through a difficult task. In addition, it can calm you down when you’re worried or anxious.

If you want to change your attitude from “I can’t do this” or “I’m going to fail”, to “I’ve got this” or “I’m going to do great”, change your self -talk.

18. Use The Power of Humor. People who know how to laugh at themselves and at life’s absurdities have a great attitude. Your sense of humor is a power tool, and you can use it to lift your mood and enhance your emotional state at any time.

When something goes wrong, ask yourself, “What’s funny about this?” A humorous perspective will have a positive effect on your attitude.

19. Use Gratitude to Improve Your Attitude. When you find yourself focusing on what’s wrong in your life, what you don’t have, or what you’re missing out on, adjust your attitude by feeling gratitude.

Studies show that having an attitude of gratitude is beneficial for every aspect of your life: being grateful improves your health, your mood, your relationships, your career satisfaction, and on, and on. If you need an attitude lift simply think of all the things that you have to be grateful for.

20. Develop an Attitude of Curiosity. The best way to approach any situation is to be open to what you can learn from it. That is, be curious.

Curiosity gives you a present-moment orientation which is similar to mindfulness. Being curious about a situation allows you to experience it more fully. In addition, curiosity will help you to approach uncertainty in your daily life with a positive attitude.

21. Seek Out Others With a Positive Attitude. A positive attitude is contagious. When you feel that you need an attitude boost, find someone with a great attitude and look for an excuse to hang out with them. Their attitude can’t help but rub itself off on you and you’ll be able to face the world with renewed optimism.

Conclusion

John Mitchell once said the following: “Our attitude toward life determines life’s attitude toward us.” The 21 tips above will help you to keep a positive attitude at all times. Live your best life by having a great attitude.

خود اعتمادی اور خدا اعتمادی

خود اعتمادی اور خدا اعتمادی  ==================================
بہت سے لوگ پوچھتے ہیں کہ سر خود اعتمادی نہیں ہے ہے مجھ میں وہ کیسے پیدا کریں اپنے اندر . حضور والا  کم نصیبی یہ ہے کہ ہمارا معاشرہ اور ہمارا ماحول ہمیں یہ دونوں چیزیں مہیا نہیں کرتے   لیکن اس کا قطعا یہ مطلب نہیں کہ ہم اس دلیل کو سہارا بنا لیں اور اپنی ہر سوچ کے ساتھ منسلک کر لیں . میں سر قاسم علی شاہ صاحب کا احسان مند ہوں جنہوں نے چار منٹ میں اس کا فلسفہ بیان کر دیا . خدا پر پورا ایمان  خود اعتمادی کی پہلی سیڑھی ہے اور لوگوں پر یقین اس کی ضد ہے . آپ لوگوں پر اعتبار ضرور کریں اس کے بغیر کوئی کام نہیں چل سکتا لیکن  امید ، یقین اور توقع  صرف  خدا سے لگائیں . نتیجے کا انتظار ضرور کریں لیکن بھروسہ الله پر رکھیں . انسان کبھی بھی آپکو مطلوبہ نتیجہ نہیں دے سکتا . ہم زیادہ تر وقت خدشوں کے ساے میں رہتے ہیں  کہ یہ نہ ہو جاے، وہ ہو جاے تو پھر کیا ہو گا ، ایسا ہو گیا تو ہم کیا کریں گے ، اس نے ایسا کر دیا تو کیا ہو گا ، ....حضور والا یہ سب کم یقینی کی علامات ہیں . ہم جو دن گزر رہا ہوتا ہے اس پر توجہ نہیں دیتے اور آنے والے کل کے بارے میں پریشان رہتے ہیں  اور اس طرح ہمارا آج کا دن بھی خراب ہو جاتا ہے  . ہمارا آج کا دن ہی  ماضی بنتا  ہے اور اسی کی بنیاد پر اگلے دن کی ترتیب بنتی ہے ،
ہمارے ڈر اور خوف کی بڑی وجہ ہماری نیت اور ہمارا ارادہ ہوتا ہے . جب ہم ہر بندے سے صرف مفاد کی خاطر ملیں گے تو مفاد پورا نہ ہونے کر ڈر موجود رہے گا . ہمارا کسی سے ملنا اپنے کسی محفی ارادے کو پورا کرنے کے لیے بھی ہمیں ڈرپوک بنا دیتا ہے . یاد رکھئے گا صاف نیت اور نیک ارادے والا بندہ کسی سے نہیں ڈرتا اور بے دریغ سچ بول دیتا ہے .  اب یہاں مسلہ یہ ہے کہ ہم سچ بولتے بھی ہیں تو بڑی  حقارت سے . ہمارا مقصد اگلے کو نیچا دکھانا بھی ہوتا ہے. اس میں ہمارا حقارت بھرا لہجہ ہمارے سچ کو دبا دیتا ہے اور یوں ہم سچے ہونے کے باوجود نا پسندیدگی کی زد میں آ جاتے ہیں .  آپ سچ ضرور بولیں لیکن دوسرے کی عزت نفس کا بھی خیال رکھیں ، آپ نیت صاف اور ارادہ نیک رکھیں لیکن دوسرے بندے کو دکھانے کے لیے نہیں  اپنے رب کے لیے . آپ دوسروں کے کام آئیں لیکن بدلے کی توقع صرف رب سے رکھیں . خدا کا خوف آپکو  ساری محلوق کے ڈر سے آزاد کر دیتا ہے . خدا سے محبّت آپکو سب لوگوں سے محبت پر مجبور کر دیتی ہے . الله سائیں ہمیں اپنی اور اپنے حبیبﷺ کی محبّت نصیب کرے . امین  
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اور تم اپنے رب کی کون کون سی نعمتوں کو جھٹلاو گے

"اور تم اپنے رَب کی کون کون سی نعمتوں کو جھٹلاؤگے"       

"شادی کی پہلی سالگرہ مبارک ہو۔۔"
رات کے بارہ بجےمیں نے
اُسے جگا کر مسکراتے ہوئے اُسے مبارکباد دی۔۔۔
اُس نے پہلے اچھنبے سے مجھے دیکھا  پھر مسکرا کر مبارکباد وصول کی اور آنکھیں موندے لیٹا رہا۔۔۔۔۔۔
میرے لئے اسکا یہ انداز نیا نہیں تھا۔۔
اِس ایک سال میں اُس نے بہت کم دفعہ اپنی محبت کا اظہار کیا تھا۔۔۔
ایسا نہیں تھا کہ وہ اظہارکے معاملے میں کنجوس ہے ۔۔
ہاں وہ زبان سے اظہار کے معاملے میں بہت کنجوس ہے۔۔۔
وہ محبت کا اظہار اپنے عمل سے کرتا ہے۔۔۔
وہ میرا خیال رکھتا ہے۔۔۔
میری خواہشات کا احترام کرتا ہے۔۔
ہر معاملے میں میری رائے لیتا ھے۔۔۔
اور کوئی بھی فیصلہ باہمی مشورے کے بغیر نہیں لیتا۔۔۔ 
سب سے بڑھ کر وہ میری عزّت کرتا ہے۔۔۔ 
ہاں اظہار وہ تب کرتا ھے جب وہ ایک بے اختیاری کی گرفت میں ہوتا ھے۔۔
یا جب کوئی خوبصورت لمحہ اُسے مسمرائز کر دیتا ہے۔۔۔۔
اور اُسکا یہ کبھی کبھی محبت کا اظہار کرنا روز روز کے اظہار کے مقابلے میں محبت کی قدر کو ذیادہ بڑھا دیتا ھے۔۔
آج اُسے وِش کرنے کے بعد میں نے ایک گفٹ پیک اُس کے سامنے رکھ دیا۔
اور کندھے سے ہلا کر اُسے گفٹ کی طرف متوجہ کیا۔
اُس نے حیرت سے مجھے دیکھا اور پھر ٹیک لگا کر بیٹھنے کے بعد گفٹ کھولنے لگا۔۔
میں اُس کے عین سامنے بیٹھ گئی۔۔۔
ایک بڑے فریم میں ھماری شادی کی تصویر موجود تھی۔۔۔
تصویر میں موجود وہ لمحہ اتنا مکمل تھا کہ وہ اُن لمحوں میں کھو گیا۔۔۔
"تمہاری زندگی کا سب سے خوبصورت لمحہ کونسا ھے؟"
میں نے تصویرکی جانب دیکھتے ہوئے سوال کیا۔۔۔
"جب پہلی بار تم نے میری امامت میں اپنی فجر کی نماز پڑھی تھی۔۔۔
جانتی ہو میرا دل کیا چاہ رھا تھا۔۔۔
کہ یہ نماز کبھی ختم نہ ھو۔۔
سورۃ الرحمٰن پڑھتے ھوئے اُن لمحوں میں میرا دل حقیقت میں مجھ سے کہ رھا تھا
"اور تم اپنے رَب کی کون کون سی نعمتوں کو جھٹلاؤگے"
میرے لیے اِس سے خوبصورت اظہار کوئی نہ تھا۔۔۔
اُس نے تصویر ایک طرف رکھ کر میرے دونوں ہاتھ تھام لیے اور محبت و اپنائیت سے بھرپور لہجے میں بولا۔۔۔ "
محبت سے بھرپور ایک محرم اور شرعی زندگی کا ایک کامیاب سال بہت بہت مبارک ہو۔۔۔
بولو کیا تحفہ چاہیے تمہیں آج؟
میں نےاپنے مجازی خدا کو دیکھا۔۔
جس نے آج کے دن محبت کے اتنے خوبصورت اظہار کا تحفہ دیا مجھے ۔۔۔۔
" تمہاری امامت میں تہجد کی ایک نماز "
میں نے اپنا تحفہ مانگا۔۔۔
وہ کچھ لمحے بنا پلک جھپکے مجھے دیکھتا رھا
پھر اُس نے ذرا آگے جھک کر میری پیشانی پر شرعی رشتےکی رو سے ایک مہرِ محبت ثبت کی اور وضو کرنے اُٹھ کھڑا ھوا۔۔
جب کہ میرا دل بے اختیار کہ اُٹھا۔۔
"اور تم اپنے رَب کی کون کون سی نعمتوں کو جھٹلاؤگے" ❤